Merry Christmas Red Tape. (Christmas Humor)

No idea who wrote this but a Facebook friend shared it and I had to share it with you.

Please be advised that all employees planning to dash through the snow in a one-horse open sleigh, going over the fields and laughing all the way are required to undergo a Risk Assessment addressing the safety of open sleighs.

The assessment must also consider whether it is appropriate to use only one horse for such a venture, particularly where there are multiple passengers. Please note that permission must also be obtained in writing from landowners before their fields may be entered. To avoid offending those not participating in celebrations, we request that laughter is moderate only and not loud enough to be considered a noise nuisance.

Benches, stools and orthopaedic chairs are now available for collection by any shepherds planning or required to watch their flocks at night. While provision has also been made for remote monitoring of flocks by CCTV cameras from a centrally heated shepherd observation hut, all facility users are reminded that an emergency response plan must be submitted to account for known risks to the flocks. The angel of the Lord is additionally reminded that prior to shining his/her glory all around s/he must confirm that all shepherds are wearing appropriate Personal Protective Equipment to account for the harmful effects of UVA, UVB and the overwhelming effects of Glory

Following last year’s well publicised case, everyone is advised that legislation prohibits any comment with regard to the redness of any part of Mr. R. Reindeer. Further to this, exclusion of Mr. R Reindeer from reindeer games will be considered discriminatory and disciplinary action will be taken against those found guilty of this offence.

While it is acknowledged that gift-bearing is commonly practised in various parts of the world, particularly the Orient, everyone is reminded that the bearing of gifts is subject to Hospitality Guidelines and all gifts must be registered. This applies regardless of the individual, even royal personages. It is particularly noted that direct gifts of currency or gold are specifically precluded under provisions of the Foreign Corrupt Practices Act. Further, caution is advised regarding other common gifts, such as aromatic resins that may initiate allergic reactions.

Finally, for those involved in the recent case of the infant found tucked up in a manger without any crib for a bed, Social Services have been advised and will be arriving shortly.
Wishing you a very Merry Christmas – be safe out there.......

"DWHigh: Marijuana and Driving" (Full Story)

Let's Stop Giving Shit to Women Who Don't Want Kids. (shared article with my own comments)

Great article.  I especially love it as it was written by a woman who has kids.   People need to stop sticking their noses in to other peoples reproductive lives.  It is none of your business if someone else has kids or not.  Besides, why is it such a big concern of yours if your friend, co worker, or family member has kids.  Why are you that interested in someone elses reproductive life.  That sounds rather creepy when you think about it.   It is their business, not yours.

Link Here.

Ellie Goulding directed by Scarlett Johansson (Full Performance) | #Amex...

The New Starbucks Cup is not a War on Christmas

Posted by Zman

Every year it seems the war on Christmas crowd finds a new target.  This year as we all know it is Starbucks.  This year as we all know by now Starbucks changed the design of their cup from winter scenes and snowflakes to a red and green cup.  Not a big deal.  Well to most of us anyway.  But to some , it was as if the world has come to an end.   The people with the persecution complexes had to get all butt hurt over the new cup design and claim Starbucks was raging a "war on Christmas" because they changed the design of a coffee cup and are trying to take the "Christ out of Christmas" .  These people I guess are not smart enough to realize that first, red and green are in fact Christmas colors. And second, winter scenes and Reindeer are not Christian symbols.  Some of these nuts are even calling for a boycott of Starbucks.  What makes this even sillier is that Starbucks has plenty of other Christmas themed products.  Not to mention that Starbucks is a private company.  They are not required to do anything to recognize any holiday.  If you don't like the fact that Starbucks has red and green coffee cups here is what you do.  I'll make this very simple for those of you who have a hard time with this kind of thing.  BUY YOUR COFFEE SOMEPLACE ELSE.  See what a simple solution that is?   And you don't have to make yourself look like a complete idiot for getting all butt hurt over the color of a coffee cup.

There is no war on Christmas.  All the TV specials, Christmas displays in stores, the fact that most stores have already begun playing Christmas Music.  The whole idea that there is somehow a war on Christmas is just laughable.   If you are bothered by things like the color of a cup or how someone greets you during the holiday season, I suggest you take a look at your priorities because they are pretty messed up and  you are being a complete idiot.   Not everyone is going to conform to your way of thinking.   Suck it up buttercup and quit complaining about the color of a cup when there are far more important things to be worrying about.  Put some of that energy in to you know helping the homelesss, feeding the hungry, taking care of the sick.  You know things Christ might do?  Funny how those of us who don't believe in a god understand what the stores of Christ taught better than some Christians.   Forget putting the Christ back in Christmas.  How about putting Christ back in  Christianity and stop complaining about such mundane stuff.

Satanic Temple Answers Coaches Prayer

Another religious nut wants to use school time to pray.  Well, what these nuts keep forgetting is that if they are allowed to pray to their imaginary friend during a school activity or on school time then all beliefs must be allowed.  I love when things like this backfire on these nuts.

Full Story Here

Sean Hannity Falls for Hoax News Story and Defends Himself by Attacking The Site that Called Him Out Making Him Look Like An Even Bigger Fool

Sean Hannity tried to defend himself after falling for a fake news story by attacking the site that called him out and making himself look even more foolish.  I guess when you call a right wing nut out for falling for a fake news story they react by calling you a "liberal"  and claim they are being attacked because they just cannot admit when they are wrong and to top if off you then try and claim you never said what you said even though there is video of you saying it on your own show and a written transcript to go along with the video proving you said it.  Wow, When these right wing nuts  dig themselves in to a hole they dig a big one.   Which makes them look even more childish.

Full article here.

REI to give its Employees Black Friday Off

Kudos to REI for doing this for its employees.

Full Story here.

Your Brain on Marijuana is Just Fine

People like to say that smoking Marijuana kills brain cells but just like the other negative effects people like to claim this one too is false.

Full story here.

In Case You Missed It, Watch The Wild Seventh Inning of Today's Blue Jays/Rangers Game

If you missed the Blue Jays Vs Rangers game today.  You missed the wild seventh inning.  Below is a video link to what happened

Video here.

Ten Myths About The Ten Commandments

From the article,

"Legislators in Arkansas believe that you can’t fathom America without first understanding the Ten Commandments.

“In order that they may understand and appreciate the basic principles of the American system of government, the people of the United States of America and of the State of Arkansas need to identify the Ten Commandments, one of many sources, as influencing the development of what has become modern law,” intoned legislation authorizing placement of a Ten Commandments monument at the state Capitol in Little Rock.

There is one problem, though: No evidence exists that the Ten Commandments, a code of religious behavior found in the Old Testament of the Bible, in any way influenced the development of the American system of government.

The belief that the Decalogue is the font of all American law and the basis of our government is treasured by many Religious Right activists. But that doesn’t mean it’s accurate. As proposals to display the Ten Commandments on government property spread, it’s important to understand what’s really going on here: Powerful sectarian lobbies are looking for a way to create a symbolic merger between church and state by persuading government bodies to display a code that largely regulates religious behavior.

With that thought in mind, here are 10 myths about the Ten Commandments:

1.) The Founding Fathers relied on the Ten Commandments when creating the American government.

The Founding Fathers rarely, if ever, cited the Ten Commandments during the creation of the American government.

This question of the founders’ relationship to the Ten Commandments was answered definitively in 2003 when 41 professors and legal historians weighed in on a lawsuit challenging Alabama Supreme Court Chief Justice Roy Moore’s display of the Ten Commandments in the state Judicial Building in Montgomery. The scholars, brought together by Steven K. Green, former legal director at Americans United and now a law professor at Willamette University College of Law in Salem, Ore., filed a friend-of-the-court brief mustering ample historical evidence to debunk claims by Moore’s attorneys that the judge had the right to display the Ten Commandments because they are the foundation of American law.

Nothing in the nation’s legal history supports Moore’s view, the legal scholars and historians said, asserting in part, “Aside from a failed attempt in the seventeenth century to establish a biblically based legal system in the Puritan colonies, American law is generally viewed as having secular origins.”

The brief noted that “various documents and texts” figured in the development of American law, among them English common and statutory law, Roman law, the civil law of continental Europe and private international law.

American law, they pointed out, was also influenced by the writings of William Blackstone, John Locke, Adam Smith and others as well as the Magna Carta, the Federalist Papers and other sources.

“Each of these documents had a far greater influence on America’s laws than the Ten Commandments,” asserted the brief. “Indeed, the legal and historical record does not include significant and meaningful references to the Ten Commandments, the Pentateuch or to biblical law generally…as can best be determined, no delegate ever mentioned the Ten Commandments or the Bible.”

Concluded the brief, “While the Ten Commandments have influenced some of our notions of right and wrong, a wide variety of other documents have played a more dominant and central role in the development of American law. No respected scholar of legal or constitutional history would assert that the Ten Commandments have played a dominant or major role, or even a significant role, in the development of American law as a whole. To insist on a closer relationship or to claim the Ten Command­ments has a special place in the development of American law lacks historical support.”

Full article here.

17 biblical rules for marriage the Kim Davis set chooses to ignore

Despite what Kim Davis and her ilk will tell you marriage has been defined many ways in the bible  and has many rules they seem to have forgotten.  Here are 17 different rules regarding biblical marriage.  I would love to hear someone point this stuff out to thesse nuts.  I'm sure that would be very entertaining.

article here 

The Death Star Architect Speaks Out

Christian Persecution in the U S is A Myth (Video)

Many Christians in the U S will claim they are being persecuted for their beliefs.  This is simply a myth.   What they are really upset about is that they are not allowed to use their religion to spread their hate.  These people clearly have no idea what actual persecution is.  The article and videos below explain why the whole idea of Christians being persecuted in the U S is completely insane.

Article and videos here 

Kim Davis Supporters Getting More and More Desperate As They Realize They Are Losing.

If you serve in a public capacity and your job is to issue marriage licenses you do not get to opt out because of your religious beliefs.   As has been noted, Kim Davis has been married four times and has committed adultery.  Yet wants to claim she won't issue marriage licenses because of her "deeply held religious beliefs and what the bible says about homosexuality"  Now if people like Kim Davis would actually read the bible they would also realize that divorce and adultery are also against biblical law.  Not to mention that she also wears mixed fabrics which is also banned.  I wonder if these same nuts who support Kim Davis would also support a county clerk who did not want to issue a gun permit due to their religious beliefs,  I'm guessing they would all be up in arms ovver that one pardon the pun.  You cannot use your religion as an excuse to push your bigotry especially if your job is serving the public.  If you think your beliefs prevent you from doing your job then you should not be doing that job.

Her supporters know they are losing as public opinion has change d in favor of marriage equality and they don't realize how absurd they sound.  

Full story here.

Not All Heroes Are People - Daisy The Dog Hoax

Now there are a few obvious clues that this is false.  First, the idea that one dog would run alone back in to a building to rescue almost 1,000 people is a little silly, second, The World Trade Center only had 110 floors not 112.  The person who made this story up was not very good at checking their acts.  Also a guide dog is not going to leave its owners side.  Once a dog and his or her owner is out of a burning building the dog is not going to run back in without his master.  Third,  there is no evidence that a dog named Daisy was one of the service dogs that actually did help rescue people from the WTC.  Also, if this really did happen there would have been all over the news and no credible news service has any such story.  Now there were indeed service dogs that did rescue people from the WTC and they did get plenty of media attention.  So there is no need to keep sharing this story as it never happened.

This article has more on the hoax. 

Hackers Steel Account Information From 225,000 I Phone Users Who's Phones Have Been Jail Broken

Here is the article. 

Google Will Soon Start Punishing Mobile Sites That Use Annoying App Install Ads

Those ads that take up the whole screen on your mobile device could be a thing of the past if more search engines follow suite.

Full Story Here

Religious Nut Case Pat Robertson: Market Crash God's Punishment For Abortion Rights, Planned Parenthood Funding - See more at: http://www.rightwingwatch.org/content/pat-robertson-market-crash-gods-punishment-abortion-rights-planned-parenthood-funding#sthash.db03PvaH.dpuf

I don't know about you but the god this nut keeps talking about does not sound like the kind of god I'd want anything to do with . Basically this god does not get his way so he throws a temper tantrum and causes bad things to happen? Sounds more like a seven year old throwing a fit because he didn't get his way. I think the idea that an angry god causes disasters is not something that most people even most Christians have believed for quite some time. I think Patty boy needs to get his mind out of the fifteenth century.

Full story here.

10 egregious myths the religious perpetuate about atheists, debunked

It seems silly that people actually believe these myths but they do.  

Article here.